What Should a Man Write in His Dating App Bio?

Write three short things. Say what you do and where you are in plain words, add one detail no other man would write, and end on something she can answer in a line. Skip the adjectives you apply to yourself, the list of hobbies, and anything negative. The bio has one job, which is to make a stranger want to talk to you.

The first line orients her. "Civil engineer, moved here from Ohio two years ago" is dull on purpose. It tells her who you are so the next line can be interesting.

The second line is the detail. It is the thing she will quote back to you when she writes. The third line is the easy reply: a small question, a mild opinion she can disagree with, or a plan she can join.

If a line does not do one of those three things, cut it.

Most men stall here because they believe they have nothing interesting to say, but they do and simply do not see it.

Ask two friends what they tease you about. Look back over the last month and find the story you told twice. Think about the small, strange commitment you take too seriously: your Sunday pancake recipe, your feud with a neighbor's rooster, the trail you have hiked eleven times.

That is your line. A habit you actually have is specific, and specific is what makes a stranger smile.

Labels do nothing, because every man uses the same ones.

Weak: "I love to travel and try new restaurants." Strong: "I plan trips around a single restaurant, then act surprised when there is a trail nearby."

Weak: "Funny, adventurous, down to earth." Strong: "I will try any hike once, unless it starts like the first scene of a survival documentary."

Weak: "Looking for my partner in crime." Strong: "Looking for someone to settle the argument over which dessert deserves the most respect."

The test is easy. If your bio could be pasted onto another man's page without changing a word, it is too generic.

A bio that is only about you leaves her nothing to say. Give her a hook she can grab in two seconds.

Questions with an obvious answer work best. "Tell me the best breakfast place in town and I'll go this weekend" gives her a topic and a reward. "Ask me anything" gives her homework, and so does "just message me".

a dating coach has a related warning about prompts. If an app gives you a prompt, do not waste it by asking her a boring get-to-know-you question like her dream vacation. You only get a few chances to show your personality, so use them to say something about you.

Cut anything negative first. No list of what you do not want, no joke about hating the app, no remark that everyone here is the same.

Cut the stock phrases next: good vibes, partner in crime, work hard play hard, a gentleman who treats a lady right. coach points out that the average man writes that last one, and women read it dozens of times a week.

Be careful with star sign, politics and religion. In My breakdowns, those are likelier to lose you a woman than win you one, because any woman who disagrees can rule you out and a woman who agrees will not fall for you over it.

Last, cut anything your photos already show. If you hold a surfboard in one of them, she knows you surf.

Some apps give you one open box. Some split the writing into separate prompts. The total comes out about the same, but the trap changes.

With prompts, do not let three answers do the same job. Three jokes read like one line written three times. Give each answer its own role: one that shows what you do, one that shows how you talk, one that gives her something to answer.

Show instead of tell. A short specific story with some wit in it is proof. "I'm adventurous" is a claim anyone can make.

Read it out loud as if you were saying it to a woman across a table. Any sentence you would not say to a person does not belong in the bio.

"Seeking a partner in crime for spontaneous adventures" fails that test. "I'm usually up for a last-minute plan" passes it.

Then leave it alone for a week and watch whether more women reach out. Rewriting a bio every night means you never learn which version worked.