Why Am I Banned From Both Tinder and Hinge?

Because the two apps belong to the same family of companies, and a ban on one can lead to a ban on the other. Tinder's Terms of Use say it may ban a user from Tinder and from its affiliates' services, and the companies it names include Hinge. Tinder also says it shares data across Match Group companies for safety, which lets it act against fake accounts, spam, abuse and fraud across the services.

Tinder's Terms of Use state that it may ban a user from Tinder and from its affiliates' services. The list it gives includes Hinge, Plenty of Fish, OkCupid and Match, along with others. The Terms also say it may prevent new accounts from being created.

Read that plainly. A decision about one account can reach the others, and the same company group may keep you from starting over.

Tinder explains the data sharing as a safety measure. Match Group companies share information so they can act against fake accounts, spam, abuse and fraud wherever they appear.

That is good for the women using the apps, and it is the reason a man with one serious violation can find himself locked out of more than one place. The apps treat a person as a person, not as an account.

Be careful here. It is likely that the two bans are connected, but you cannot prove it from the outside. Hinge could have acted for its own reasons, such as reports from women you matched with on that app.

A useful test is to compare the notices. Read the email and the screen each app gave you. If either one names a reason, you know more than most banned men do. If neither does, that is normal too. Tinder says it may not explain the reason when doing so would affect other users' safety.

Accounts are banned when they violate the Community Guidelines or the Terms of Use. A few of the guideline rules catch ordinary men more often than the rest.

One person gets one account. Opening a second account, or opening one after a ban, breaks that rule. No fake accounts and no pretending to be someone else. That covers photos of other people, even as a joke. No spam or harmful links, so promoting a business or a social account in chats is out. No scams. And no third-party apps that add features the app does not offer, which includes auto-swiping tools.

Reports from women are the other major route. A rude reply after she stops answering, a crude line she never invited, or pushing after a no can all end in a report. a dating coach's advice on standing out is the sensible counter: be memorable, and know that memorable does not mean rude.

Check which one you have, because the two are very different. Tinder says a suspension lasts six months, while a ban is permanent and you cannot make new accounts.

If you are suspended, the account comes back at the end of the period, and the worst move available is to break more rules while you wait.

Any action against an account can be appealed in Tinder's Appeal Center. Sign in with your usual login, find the violation, and submit an appeal. Keep it short, calm and factual. Anger reads like the behavior the rule was written to stop.

Hinge runs its own appeal for its own ban, shown on the screen you see when you open the app. Appeal each one separately, since they are separate decisions.

Do not create a new account on either app while you wait. It breaks the rules again at the moment you are asking them to believe the first ban was a mistake.

Tinder says it may not explain the reason for a ban when doing so would affect other users' safety. Hinge says much the same in many cases. So writing in to demand a reason rarely works, and a long argument with support only wastes the energy you need for the appeal.

Work from what you can see instead. The notice, the Appeal Center and your own conversation history are the only real evidence you have, and they are usually enough to find the cause.

Whatever the outcome, go back over your last few conversations as if a stranger wrote them. Look for the sour reply, the unrequested joke, the link, the tool that swiped for you. If you find one, you probably have your answer.

Then fix the habits that cause trouble. Write only what you would say across a table. Use the apps for dating and nothing else. Move a good conversation toward a plan and a phone call, so you spend less time typing into the app and have fewer chances to say something that gets you reported.