Is Barnes and Noble a Good Place to Meet Women?

Yes. A big Barnes and Noble is one of the calmer daytime places to meet women in person. Women browse there alone and slowly, many stores have a cafe and seating, and the book in her hand gives you an honest reason to say something. The weak points are that the store can be quiet, the number of women at any one time is small, and some sections are full of parents with children. Go at busy browsing hours, stay out of the kids' section, and ask her about what she is reading.

A bookstore slows people down. Nobody rushes past the fiction tables. A woman picking up books, reading the back cover and putting them down again is standing still with time to spare.

What she picks up also tells you something about her, and asking about it is natural. "Is that any good? I keep seeing it everywhere" is a real question with a real answer, not a line. People like talking about books they love, and they like being asked for a recommendation.

Barnes and Noble stores are also large. That means more people, more room to move and less of the feeling that everyone is watching you, which is a real problem in a small shop.

Each section draws a different crowd.

• New releases and fiction tables. The busiest browsing area, and the easiest place to start a conversation about a book.
• Travel and cookbooks. People here are planning something, which gives you an easy question about where or what.
• The cafe. Women sit with a drink and a stack of books. A light comment works if she is flicking through them, less so if she is deep in one.
• Gifts and stationery. Slower and chattier, especially before the holidays.

Skip the children's section. Most women there are parents with their kids, and an approach there will go badly.

Weekday mornings can be nearly empty. Weekend afternoons and weekday evenings are the busiest browsing times. Before the holidays the store fills with people buying gifts, which is a good time, because everyone is looking for ideas and happy to swap them.

A store near a university or a busy shopping street usually has more people your age than a quiet suburban one.

Keep it about the books, and keep your voice at a normal indoor level.

• "I need a recommendation, and you look like you know what you're doing."
• "Is that one worth it? I've read the back three times and still can't decide."
• "I'm buying a present for my sister and I'm completely lost. What would you get?" Only if it is true.

a dating coach remembers using playful openers in bookstores for men who were very nervous. The man would walk up holding a dating advice book, act deliberately awkward as a joke, then drop the act and introduce himself properly. It is silly, and that is the point. A bit of fun takes the pressure off both of you.

A few habits turn a bookstore approach uncomfortable.

• Reading over her shoulder, or grabbing the same book she just put down as an excuse to talk.
• Standing too close in a narrow aisle where she cannot step away.
• Whispering. A normal, relaxed voice is less strange than a hushed one.
• Interrupting a woman in the cafe who is absorbed in her book.

If she answers briefly and turns back to the shelf, say "Enjoy it" and move on.

Independent bookstores are smaller and more personal. The staff know the regulars, and there are often readings and book clubs, which are good for meeting people. But in a small shop, every conversation is overheard.

Barnes and Noble is bigger and more anonymous. You can talk to someone in travel and nobody in fiction knows. For a man who is nervous about being watched, that makes it an easier place to start.

A quiet store makes the walk over feel louder than it is. A Cold Approach Bootcamp trains that moment in person, in Miami and New York, with daygame on streets and in cafes and night game in bars and lounges. Each training day is two four-hour blocks in the field, with a coach on every approach and feedback after every set.

Group is three consecutive days at three students per coach, and Private is 1-on-1 for one, two or three days. There is no skill floor, and every student leaves with a written practice plan.