How to Go Out to Bars as a Solo Traveler

The easiest start is a social hostel. Its bar and common areas are the simplest places to begin talking, and many hostels let people who are not guests join their pub crawls. From there, go out to local bars with the people you meet, or alone with a calm hello. Nobody on the trip knows you, which makes a flat conversation cost very little.

Solo travelers on forums agree: a social hostel is the best way to meet others. The bar and the common room are full of people who traveled alone and want company.

You do not have to sleep there. At many hostels you can join a pub crawl even if you are staying elsewhere. Ask at the front desk, pay the small fee, and go. You will be moving with twenty people who are all looking to talk.

If a hostel is not your style, look for walking tours, food tours and language exchanges. They work the same way: a group who came to meet people.

At home, you may hold back because someone you know could see. On a trip, that fear disappears. Nobody knows you, so a flat attempt costs little. That is a good reason to be a little bolder than usual.

The same rules of comfort and respect still apply. Be warm, be brief, and take a no gracefully. A trip is not a license to be pushy, and a bad reputation travels fast among hostel crowds.

Once you have met a few people, you can also go out solo. A man alone at a bar is easy to talk to, and easy to talk with.

Pick a bar with a lively crowd and a bar top you can sit at. Order something simple. Put your phone away, face the room, and say hello to the bartender or the person next to you. Ask what they would recommend in the city.

Local tips are the best opener a traveler has. "I just got in today, where would you go tonight?" is true, easy to answer and starts a conversation within seconds.

You meet women the same way you meet anyone: with a friendly line about the shared moment. Travelers swap stories freely, so ask where she has been, what she has loved and what she would skip.

Keep the first conversation short and light. If it goes well, join her group or suggest going to another place together. Ask for her number or Instagram so you can meet again before you each leave.

Time is short on a trip, which can make some men rush. Rushing makes the other person uncomfortable. Warm and unhurried works better than eager.

A few ground rules help on any trip:

• Tell someone where you are going, and keep your phone charged.
• Watch your drink and your pace, because a clear head is your best asset.
• Walk back with people you have met when you can, or take a licensed taxi.
• Leave any place that feels wrong, without explaining.

A good night is one you remember with a clear head.

The skill of opening a conversation with a stranger works in every city. A man who has practiced it at home will find a trip far easier, because he does not stall at the first bar door.

Men who wait until they are abroad to try it often find that the first hello is the hardest part, and that the trip is nearly over by the time they stop hesitating.

Cold Approach's Bootcamp is where you can build the habit with a coach beside you. It is in person and fully in the field, in Miami and New York only. You get live coaching on every approach and feedback after every set. Group is three consecutive days at three students per coach. Private is fully one-on-one for one, two or three days.

Each training day is two four-hour blocks, with daygame and night game mixed to suit you. There is no skill floor, a total beginner is welcome, and approach anxiety is a specialty. You take the same skills to any city you visit.