You verify from your page in the app. Tap Verification, then tap Verify next to the method you want to use, such as Facebook, photos, email or your phone number. Once you are verified, a white checkmark on a blue badge shows next to you in Finder, and some of the verification options also give you a free Major Crush.

The steps

  1. Go to My Profile.
  2. Tap Verification. If you do not see it, tap Complete profile and then Verification.
  3. Pick a method and tap Verify next to it. Hily lists options such as Facebook, Photos, Email and Phone number.
  4. Follow what the app asks for that method.

When it is done, the checkmark appears on your account in Finder. That is where women are deciding whether to like you, so it is exactly where you want it.

Which method to pick

Hily gives you a choice, so pick the one you are comfortable with. Before you do, check which options come with the free Major Crush. Some of them do, and a free extra is worth taking.

Nothing stops you from doing more than one. Each method is a small signal that a real man set this account up on purpose. A man who bothered to verify reads as someone who takes the app seriously, and small signs like that add up.

What the checkmark tells her

The badge answers one question before you have written a word: is this a real person?

That question matters more than men think. Catfish and bots are on a dating coach's short list of what makes online dating frustrating. Women deal with both, and every fake account a woman has come across makes her a little warier of the next stranger. You are that next stranger.

coach has his own version of the same caution. He trusts a woman's photos, but he mentally knocks a bit off what they show. If her photos look suspicious, with odd angles or no full-length shots, he asks for a video call before the date. A woman looking at you may be running the same kind of check, and a checkmark takes one of those doubts off the table.

A checkmark will not make her attracted to you. What it does is take away one reason for her to keep her guard up.

Should you bother?

For nearly everyone, yes. It costs a few taps, it might come with a free Major Crush, and the badge then sits there working on every woman who sees you.

There is one exception. If your photos have drifted away from how you look now, verifying is not your first job. Fix the pictures, because they are hurting you with or without a badge.

Old photos undo the badge

A verified account is a real account. Nothing about the badge says your pictures were taken this decade.

My rule of thumb is to get new photos taken every four or five years so they stay roughly current. His example is blunt: you do not want to be a 40-year-old man using pictures of himself at 20. That gap shows the moment she walks into the bar, and a verified badge on top of old photos only makes the surprise feel worse.

coach is candid that he considers himself fairly average-looking. He credits his style, grooming and clothes for most of how good he looks in photos. His advice is not to wait until you are perfect. Take the best photos you can now, and take new ones as you improve.

Aim for photos that look like you on a normal good day. She should walk in, spot you straight away and relax, instead of spending the first ten minutes matching your face to your pictures.

Keep the trust going once you are talking

The badge opens the door. What you write decides whether she walks through it.

While she chats with you, part of her is quietly asking whether you are someone she would feel safe having a drink with. So keep your first messages light and specific. My advice is to write something relevant to her that gives her something to react to, rather than asking how her weekend was.

My order from there is simple. Open with something about her, trade a few playful lines, and watch for the moment she plays along with a joke or starts trying to impress you back. That is your cue to suggest a plan. coach likes a short phone call before the first date, because a woman who has already heard your voice shows up relaxed and excited instead of nervous. If she would rather skip the call and just meet, he does not push it.

Real, relaxed and ready with a plan is a hard combination to turn down.