Why Does Tinder Make You Verify Your Age?

Because Tinder's minimum age is 18, and depending on where you are, it may be required to confirm that you are over it. Tinder says the check is there to prove you are 18 or older and to comply with its Terms of Use. It is not an accusation. Where the check is needed before you can chat, you start it by tapping a match on your match list and then tapping Verify My Age. Everywhere else, a prompt appears on your home screen.

Tinder's own wording is that you may be asked to verify your age depending on your location. That is the whole reason one man gets the prompt and his friend in another country never sees it.

So there is nothing to read into it. It does not mean someone reported you, and it does not mean your pictures made you look young. The rule belongs to the place, and everyone on Tinder in that place gets the same request.

There are two ways in, and which one you see depends on where the requirement sits.

• When the check is needed to chat. Open your match list, tap a match, and tap Verify My Age.
• Everywhere else. A prompt shows up on your home screen. Tap it and follow the steps.

Have your ID with you before you begin. Tinder accepts a driver's license or a passport. It turns away student IDs, resident cards, pension books and temporary driver's licenses, so reach for the plastic license or the passport from the start.

Where the check is required for chat, you cannot talk to any of your matches until you finish it. That is the part men underestimate.

A woman who just matched with you is paying attention to you right now. A day later she has matched with other people and half forgotten your pictures. A week later you are a stranger again. The window where a good first message lands easily is short, and an unfinished check spends it for you.

So do it the same evening. It takes a few minutes of your time, and Tinder says the whole review should take less than a few hours.

This is a good moment to look at the age on your account and ask whether it is true.

Some men fudge a year or two because they know women set age ranges. That is a bad trade. She finds out on the first date anyway, and once she catches one detail that was edited, she starts wondering about the rest. A man who is plainly comfortable with his real age reads as more attractive than one pretending to be younger.

If your age came from a typo at sign-up, fix it through the routes Tinder gives you rather than living with the wrong number. The wrong age puts you in front of the wrong women, and hides you from the right ones.

Some men see the prompt, sigh, and delete the app. They move to another one and start again from nothing.

That trades a few minutes with an ID for a blank account somewhere else. No matches, no conversations in progress, and the same work of building an account women stop for. Meanwhile the women who liked you on Tinder are still there, waiting to hear from you.

Unless you have a real reason not to show an ID, the check is the shorter road. Get it done and keep the matches you already earned.

Once you are through, the check has done its job and the rest is up to you.

Go back to the women who matched while you were waiting. Start with the one you are most keen on. Skip the long apology for the delay. A short line and then a real question about something in her pictures works far better. Something like: "That view in your third picture looks unreal. Where was that?" Or ask about the dog she is clearly proud of.

Keep the chat light and specific. When she is plainly enjoying it, suggest a plan with a place and a day. a dating coach's advice on moving from texting to a date is to make that the goal from the start, rather than letting a conversation drift for weeks. A verified account gets you to the starting line. What you say next decides whether you get a date.