What to Wear on a First Date

Wear clean clothes that fit you, suit the place, and are one step nicer than what the regulars there wear. Choose something you can sit in comfortably for two hours. You do not need a special outfit. You need clothes that look like you chose them on purpose, because that tells her you made an effort without trying too hard.

Fit matters more than price. A cheap shirt that fits across the shoulders looks better than an expensive one that hangs off you.

Check these in a mirror before you leave:

• The shoulder seam sits on the edge of your shoulder.
• The sleeves end around your wrist or midway down your upper arm, depending on the shirt.
• The shirt reaches your belt, not your thighs.
• Your pants follow your legs without squeezing them, and they touch the top of your shoes with a small fold.

Take a full-body photo from six feet away. A photo shows problems you miss when looking down at yourself.

If you want one answer, this is it: a solid shirt that fits you, dark jeans, clean leather shoes or boots, and a light jacket you can take off. Navy or olive for the shirt, and a belt that matches your shoes.

It looks like you made an effort without looking dressed up, and it works for coffee, a casual dinner and most bars.

Keep it casual and neat. A solid T-shirt or knit polo, dark jeans or clean chinos, and simple sneakers or boots work for coffee. Add a light jacket if the weather asks for it.

Leave the gym clothes at home. Sweatpants, a wrinkled hoodie and running shoes say you did not care where you ended up.

Go one level up. A button-up shirt with sleeves that fit, dark trousers or jeans, and leather shoes or clean boots suit most restaurants and bars. A fitted jacket helps if the room is dressy. You do not need a full suit unless the place calls for one. A suit with no reason can look like you came straight from work.

If you are unsure, picture the room: small tables, dim light, nicer glasses. Then dress for that without copying every other man there.

In summer, breathable fabrics keep you from sweating through a shirt. Linen, light cotton and short-sleeve button-ups work. Avoid anything so thin that a sweat patch shows. Wear shoes that look clean with no socks if the style fits, or low socks that do not show.

In winter, a good coat does the most work, because she sees it first and last. Pick one that fits across the shoulders and ends near your hips or thighs. Wear a sweater that fits under it. Do not hide your shape under a puffy layer you never remove.

Stay with colors that work together: navy, black, white, gray, olive, tan and brown. Dark colors look neat and suit most places. Add one color through one shirt or jacket if you want, like a burgundy shirt with gray pants. Avoid large logos and writing across your chest. They tell her little about you.

Shoes get noticed. Wipe white sneakers, brush your boots, and replace anything with cracked leather or worn soles.

For hair, get a haircut a few days before the date, not that morning. Style it simply with a little product or none, and keep it neat. Trim your beard or shave your neck. Do not try a new look you have not worn before.

Then the details:

• Shower, use deodorant, and wear a small amount of cologne, if you wear any, so she notices it only when she is close.
• Check the collar and cuffs for stains.
• Empty your pockets so they do not bulge.
• Trim your nails.
• Carry gum or a mint.

You can skip the trendy pieces. Choose classic items that fit well: a good pair of dark jeans, a well-cut shirt, a jacket and decent shoes. At this stage, looking put together matters more than looking fashionable.

• Clothes you have never worn, which may fit badly or itch.
• Anything you have to keep adjusting.
• Strong cologne.
• A suit or tie when the place is casual.

If you keep tugging at your shirt, the fit is wrong.

Once you are dressed, stop thinking about the outfit. Put your attention on her. A man who is comfortable in what he is wearing is easier to talk to, and that is the real goal of the outfit.