Is It Okay to Approach Women Who Are Dancing?

Yes, as long as you read the situation first and accept her answer. Women go out to dance to have a good time, and a friendly man who joins that good time is often welcome. A woman who is lost in the music with her eyes closed, or one packed in a tight circle of friends, usually is not asking for company. The skill is telling those two apart, and being easy about it either way.

That covers how to approach a girl who is dancing and how to approach women on the dance floor. Both come down to the same three things: timing, how you enter and how you leave if it is not a fit.

A dance floor is a social place. People are there to move, laugh and meet others, and nobody is trying to concentrate on anything. a dating coach notes that some women stay on the floor all night, which means that if you never approach them there, you may never approach them at all.

A woman dancing with friends has also already said something about her mood. She is out and open to fun. That makes it a better moment than a quiet evening where she is deep in a conversation or heading home.

Not every woman who is dancing wants to be approached. Hold off if:

• She is turned inward with her friends and keeps closing the circle.
• She keeps pulling away when someone gets near.
• She looks upset, or her friends are checking on her.
• She has clearly said no to someone else a moment ago, and you would be the next in a row.

None of that makes you a bad man for approaching. It means the moment is poor, and a good approach is one where she can easily say no. If you cannot tell, a quick hello and one friendly sentence will show you.

a dating coach's guidance on the dance floor starts with space. If there is room between the woman you want and her friends, make eye contact and offer to dance. A brief smile first is enough.

If she is tight with her friends, the floor is loud and full of distractions, so you need a bit more energy and clearer body language. a dating coach suggests leading with high intensity in that case, such as a light tap on the shoulder, and then engaging the whole group once she turns around. Keep your touch light and brief, and step back if she does not want it.

Whatever you do, treat her friends as people. a dating coach says her friends matter a great deal. Say hi to them. Ask whether they are her friends. If the group is on your side early, you will not have a wall in front of you later. Switch between her and the group for a short while, then give her more of your attention.

The floor is loud, so keep it short:

• A warm "Hi, I'm [name]" with a smile.
• "You looked like the one having the most fun out here."
• An offer to dance, with an easy out: "Mind if I join for a song?"

Then dance, loosely and without performing. a dating coach's note on style is that in American venues you tend to dance closer, while in Europe people keep more distance and talk. Match the room and her comfort.

Do not escalate in front of her friends. Escalating physically in front of them can make them protective. a dating coach's main goal on the floor is to get one on one with her: take her off the dance floor for a drink or a conversation, where you can actually hear her. He also points out that dancing for too long around the group can turn you into an entertainer instead of someone she connects with.

A no on a dance floor may be a head shake, a turn away or a polite "I'm just here with my friends." Smile and say "No problem, have a great night," then walk off. Do not hover nearby or dance on her friends. The quickest way to spoil a venue for yourself is to become the man who keeps turning up.

Two things transfer to every dance floor: a clean, friendly entry and a graceful exit. Practice both on easy approaches before you try them in the loudest club in town.

A Cold Approach Bootcamp includes night game in the field alongside daygame, mixed to suit you. Each training day is two four-hour blocks in Miami or New York, with your coach next to you for live feedback after every approach, including how you read a group and how you handle a no.

Group runs three consecutive days at three students to a coach. Private is one, two or three days, fully one-on-one.