How Long Do Matches Last on Dating Apps?

It depends on the app. On Bumble a match lasts 72 hours unless someone writes first. On Hinge and Tinder, the help centers describe no timer at all, so a match stays until one of you ends it or deletes the account.

Bumble is the one app here with a real clock, and the clock runs in two stages.

Once you match, both people have 72 hours to send an opening message. Each of you gets one opening message before the chat fully opens. If neither of you writes within those 72 hours, the match expires.

If one person does write first, the clock restarts for the other. They have 72 hours from that point to reply.

An expired match shows a grey circle around the profile photo. You are not stuck with it. Everyone gets one free Extend a day, which adds 72 hours. Bumble Boost, Premium and Premium+ members can extend unlimited matches, and they can use Rematch to restart the 72 hour timer.

Hinge's help center lists three reasons a match can disappear. The other person unmatched you, she deleted her account, or her account was removed for breaking the terms of use. An expiry timer is not on the list.

So a Hinge match does not run out by itself. If it is gone, someone made it go.

Hinge does have a limit that feels like a clock. Your Turn Limits stop a man who has too many people waiting on his reply from sending or accepting new Likes until he answers someone or ends a chat. That is a limit on you, not a countdown on her.

Tinder's help center says that if one or a few matches disappear, they most likely ended the match or deleted their Tinder account. It does not describe a match expiry timer.

If a match on Tinder is missing, you did not lose it to the calendar. She, or the account, is gone.

A match with no timer still goes cold. It just goes cold on her schedule instead of the app's.

A woman who matched with you did it in the moment, with a few other men in the same hour. Every hour you wait lets that moment pass. By the time you write three days later, she may have moved on to someone who wrote on the first day, or may have forgotten who you are.

So treat the 72 hours on Bumble as the rule on every app. Write within a day, and keep the first message about something she showed you rather than a greeting.

The first message does the work the countdown cannot do. It has to give her something easy to answer.

Pick one specific thing from her photos or what she wrote. Ask a question that has a small, fun answer. Keep it short, because a long first message looks like homework.

Compare "hey, how's your week going" with a question about the place in her second photo. The first one reaches every woman and none of them. The second one could only have been sent to her.

If a match has gone quiet for a few days, one short follow-up is fine. Make it light and make it about something new, not a complaint that she did not answer.

If that gets nothing, move on. A chat that nobody wants to continue is not worth a third message, and a long list of dead matches clutters the screen where the live ones sit.

• On Bumble, send the first message while the clock has most of its time left.
• On Hinge, answer the people waiting on you so that Your Turn Limits do not stop you from liking new women.
• On Tinder, do not assume a match stays fresh. Write while she still remembers matching with you.
• On any app, a missing match is gone. Do not spend an evening wondering what you did.

The timers are the app's business. Your business is to reply while she still wants to hear from you.