How Do Tinder Interests Work?

Tinder Interests are tags that show what you are into. To add them, open your page, tap the pencil icon by your photo, scroll to Interests, select at least three and tap Done. Tinder describes them as a way to connect with potential matches and get the conversation started. You can change them from the same screen: tapping a highlighted Interest removes it, and tapping a grey one adds it.

1. Tap the profile icon.
2. Tap the pencil icon next to your profile photo.
3. Scroll down to Interests.
4. Select a minimum of three.
5. Tap Done.

To change them later, go back to the same list. A highlighted Interest is one you have chosen, and tapping it takes it off. A grey one is not chosen, and tapping it adds it.

One more detail from the same help page matters here. Your Interests appear in the order you selected them, so the first one you tap is the first one people see. Choose your favorite first.

Tinder's own description is modest, and it is the right way to think about them. They help you connect with someone and they help start the conversation.

They are not what gets you noticed. Your photos do that, and nothing in the Interests list will rescue a weak set. One well known dating coach ranks Interests as about the least important part of the whole page.

What they do well is the step after she likes what she sees. She is looking for something to say, and a good Interest gives it to her. That is a small job, but it is a real one, and most men waste it.

Choose things you actually do, not things you would like to be the kind of man who does. If you pick surfing and she asks where you surf, "I tried it once on vacation" is a flat answer.

Choose Interests your photos can back up. Cooking next to a photo of you at the stove is believable. Cooking with no evidence anywhere is filler.

Choose a spread. Three Interests that all say gym tell her one thing three times. A sport, something with food or drink, and something a little unexpected tell her three different things about your week.

And keep one that is slightly unusual. The popular picks are fine, but the odd one is the one she comments on.

When you both share an Interest, it is the easiest first message you will ever get. The trap is using it flatly. "I like hiking too" gives her nothing to answer except "cool."

Make it specific and give her an opinion to share instead:

• Shared interest in coffee: "You picked coffee, so I need your ranking. Where is the best coffee near here, and do not say the chain on the corner."
• Shared interest in travel: "Settle this. Best trip you have taken, or the one you still talk about even though it went wrong?"
• Shared interest in live music: "Best show you have been to, and is it better than the one you pretend you did not enjoy?"

Each one uses the Interest as a way in, then asks for her opinion, which is easier to answer than a question about her life story. It also shows her how you talk, which matters more than what you talk about.

The same logic works in reverse. When a woman's page shows Interests, they are her own conversation starters, chosen by her.

Pick the one that looks least common and say something with a point of view. If she lists wine, ask for the bottle she brings to a dinner to impress people. If she lists dogs and there is a dog in her photos, ask whether it has ever embarrassed her in public. A message that could only have been sent to her gets a better reply than one you could paste to anyone.

Interests you do not really have tend to come out on the date, and quickly. If you listed climbing and have not climbed in years, she will notice when you cannot name a wall.

Update them when your week changes. A man whose Interests match how he actually spends his time is easy to picture, and being easy to picture is what gets you a yes to the drink.