Dating a Woman Who Is Taller Than You

Yes, you can date a girl who is taller than you, and plenty of shorter men do it without a second thought. The height gap matters far less to her than whether you treat it as a problem. If you stand tall, joke about it easily and show her that you are the one leading the evening, the inch or two between your eyes and hers fades into the background within a few minutes.

Most of the discomfort sits in the man. You notice her shoes, you see the angle at which you look at her, and you imagine what a stranger in the street thinks. She may not be thinking about it at all.

Before the date, decide what you believe. Either the gap bothers you enough that you would rather not date taller women, which is a legitimate preference, or it does not, and you drop the topic. The mistake is the middle: going on the date while quietly scoring it, tensing up, and bringing the subject up yourself.

At some point she may tease you about it. coach covers this in a video on handling a woman's tests. When she says something like "I feel like I'm taller than you," he points out that many men are insecure about their height, and he says the key is simply not to be insecure. Answer with an easy exaggeration or a smile and carry on. A short, playful line and a change of subject work far better than a speech about how height does not matter.

Some lines that fit:

• "You are. You will be carrying the groceries for both of us, then."
• "Only if you stand up straight."
• "I have never needed the top shelf anyway."

The tone matters more than the words. If you say it relaxed, it reads as confidence. If you say it defensively, she hears an insecure man.

• Stand straight and take space. Slouching to hide a gap makes it worse. Shoulders back, chin level.
• Do not pose around her. Skip the tiptoes and the odd leaning. Let her wear her heels.
• Choose seats well. At a table or on a couch the gap nearly disappears, so sit side by side instead of standing in a loud bar.
• Look after your body. coach says shorter men should get in really good shape, strong and fit enough that you walk around like you could handle yourself. He says he has been with girls taller than him, and that when they saw him do something physically impressive, they became far more attracted. One girl who had not kissed him on several dates changed after he took her to a martial arts class as a date.

That last point is worth noticing. Height is one thing a woman sees. Strength, skill and confidence are others, and you can put those on display.

A taller woman usually has no trouble getting men to say yes. What she may want is a man who picks the place, makes the plan and keeps the energy up. So do that. Choose the venue, suggest the next stop, and offer a clear plan for ending the night.

On a first date this means:

• Pick an activity where you can move and talk, such as a walk, a game or a food market, so the height gap is not the focus.
• Make a clear decision when she asks "what do you want to do?"
• Touch her early and easily, on the arm or the back, so the contact feels normal instead of loaded.

The only practical issue is the first kiss, and it mostly solves itself. Stand or sit close, let the moment settle, and see whether she tilts toward you. A taller girl who likes you will meet you partway. Read her signals, check that she is leaning in, and never push. If she is not, take it as an answer and keep the evening pleasant.

If she seems cold and you assume the height is why, check the other possibilities first. Was the date dull? Did you talk about yourself too long? Did you hold back from leading? Most rejections have causes you can fix, and blaming height lets you off the hook for them.

Treat the gap as a small fact about this woman, not as a verdict on you. Stay relaxed when she jokes, keep your body strong and your posture open, and lead the date. The men who struggle here are the ones who spend the evening apologizing for something she has not mentioned.