Who Is on Raya?

Raya is one of the dating apps that admits people by application. It says its members were chosen by a committee of anonymous members, from many backgrounds, interests, ages and sexual orientations. Its own examples include scientists, cancer researchers, poets and painters from all over the world. It also says it is for friendship and professional networking as well as dating, so not every member is there to date.

Raya describes admission as a decision by a committee of anonymous members. It says they look at what makes a person's work or time stand out. They also look at how familiar the person is with the community, through referrals or shared connections. The third thing is something extra that Raya admits is hard to define.

That setup is why the membership is so mixed. Nobody is admitted for an income or a follower count alone. The committee is looking for people it would want in the room.

Many men assume Raya is only for famous people. Raya's own examples are broader. It names scientists, cancer researchers, poets and painters, and says they come from around the world.

What they share is that each has done or built something. That does not mean every member has a public name. It means most have something specific to say about what they do.

Raya says its guideline is to picture an intimate dinner party of ten and ask whom it would invite. It says how much money someone has is not what it values.

For a man, that is useful. You do not need to buy a status. The things the committee looks at, such as your work, your connections and the extra quality it cannot define, are things you can develop and show.

Members must be 18 or older. Raya says it removes members who depict themselves differently from what the committee saw, or who disrespect others.

That second point shapes the culture. The app says the people on it are expected to behave, so a rude or dishonest member can lose access. A man who wants to last there should be straightforward about who he is and polite with everyone.

Raya's App Store listing says it is for dating, friendship or professional networking. So some members who match with you may be looking for a friend or a work contact.

Read each conversation for what she wants, and do not assume. If she answers warmly but steers toward work or friendship, you can enjoy that without pushing. The women who are there to date will say so, and you can then move toward a plan.

Because the members have been chosen for what they do, the conversation has more to work with. A woman who is a researcher or a painter has something to talk about, so a first message that asks about her work does well. A flat "hey" wastes the advantage.

a dating coach's advice for any app applies here too. Be specific about her, ask a real question, and move toward a plan within a few messages. The setting is different, but the rule of giving her something to react to is the same.

If you want to apply, the useful preparation is what you would be doing anyway. Build something you can describe in a sentence, know people in the community who can vouch for you and be honest in how you present yourself. Those are the same things that make you attractive on any app.

Do not apply just because the label sounds impressive. If the reason is that you want women of a certain status, you may be disappointed, because the committee and the members are looking for substance. Apply if you would enjoy meeting the kind of people it describes.

Raya's members are people a committee chose, with a mix of backgrounds, work and ages, and Raya's own examples are scientists, researchers, poets and painters. It is not only for dating. Treat the women there as people with real interests, and your first messages will be better for it.