Meet her where she is not in a hurry. In Brooklyn that means parks and waterfront lawns on a nice day, cafes on a slow afternoon, and bars that are busy but quiet enough to talk. Brooklyn is big, so no single spot wins. The better question is which kind of place puts a woman in a mood to chat, and then going there often enough to practice.

Venues open and close fast in New York, so treat the places below as examples of a type, not an address book. Check hours and current details before you plan around any of them.

Why Brooklyn works for approaching

a dating coach calls New York his number one city in the world for learning to approach women. The reason is simple. There are a great many strangers, and many of them are out walking, sitting and socializing on foot. If a conversation goes badly, you will almost certainly never see her again, so the cost of trying is low.

Brooklyn adds a second advantage. Many neighborhoods are built for lingering: a long block of cafes, a park everybody uses, a bar on the corner. People walk slowly there and look around. That is exactly the condition you want.

Daytime: where women slow down

By day, go to places people chose in order to relax:

  • Big parks. Prospect Park and McCarren Park are the kind of place where women sit, read, walk dogs and meet friends. A woman on a bench with a book is a very different set from a woman walking fast to the train.
  • Waterfront. Brooklyn Bridge Park and the lawns along the East River in Williamsburg and Greenpoint draw people on warm days, and people on a waterfront are usually in no rush.
  • Cafes. A woman working alone at a cafe table for an hour has time. A short, friendly hello at the counter or the milk station is easy and natural.
  • Neighborhood strips. Streets in Park Slope, Fort Greene and Williamsburg are full of people window shopping at a slow pace.

Use more care on a crowded sidewalk. Many people there have headphones in or are heading somewhere, so you get fewer good conversations per hour.

Evening: bars and the late crowd

After dark, look for bars with a mix of people and a volume you can talk over. Williamsburg, Greenpoint, Bushwick and Park Slope each have a different feel, so try a few. A weeknight can be easier than a weekend: fewer people, and the women who are out often have no plan and are happy to talk.

My advice about staying out later is worth borrowing. As the night goes on, crowds thin and a woman may no longer be tied to a friend who went home. Conversations can be easier to start. Our guide to approaching in New York City goes further into the three types of rooms.

Pick the woman, not just the place

A good place does not make every woman open. Read her first:

  • Is she looking around, or locked into her phone?
  • Does she have a free moment, or is she mid-task?
  • Does she smile back at a glance, or turn away?

If she is open, say hello and give her a reason you came over, in a sentence. If she is not, let her go. The rule that matters more than any location is to talk to people who have time to talk and to leave anyone who does not.

Why a list is not enough

Knowing where to go is the easy part. The hard part is the moment a woman you want to meet is ten feet away and your legs will not move. Most men who read a list like this one still do not approach, because the obstacle was never information.

On a Bootcamp in New York, you spend your days in the field with a coach, daygame by day and nightgame at night. The coach is next to you, coaches each approach live, and gives feedback after every set. The places are chosen with you, not read from a list. A Private Bootcamp in New York is fully one-on-one for one, two or three days and is arranged with you once you book. You can read how the training is built in dating bootcamp in New York City.

Common questions

Is it easy to meet women in Brooklyn?

It is easy to be around thousands of women. Meeting them takes the skill of starting a conversation, which improves quickly with real repetitions.

Is a bar the best place to meet someone?

It is one option. Many men find a daytime park or cafe easier, because there is less noise and less pressure. A good mix of both gives you the most practice.

What if I live in another borough?

The same two ideas apply anywhere in the city: places where people slow down, and a short, friendly hello you can end easily.