What Is the Best Way to Meet Women in NYC?

The best way to meet women in NYC is cold approach: walking up to a woman you notice, in a park, a cafe or a bar, and saying hello. Nothing else in the city gives you as many chances or as much say over who you meet. Classes, friends of friends and apps are all worth adding, but they work best on top of the habit of starting conversations in person.

Men ask this a dozen ways, from where to find women in NYC to how to meet girls in New York. Below, the main methods are ranked, with a simple week that combines them.

The ranking comes down to two things: volume and control. The more women you can talk to in a week, and the more you choose which ones, the faster you meet someone you actually like.

a dating coach calls New York his favorite city in the world for daygame in the warm months, and parks are where he starts. His list is Washington Square Park, Bryant Park, Madison Square Park and Union Square Park, with Central Park usable but not as good. Which park is best changes over time, so try several.

The reason is simple. In a park, a woman has stopped moving and has nowhere to be. Often she is sitting alone. In My words, "if someone's out in a park they've come out to be among people." Coffee shops and bookstores work the same way in colder months.

At night, start with ordinary bars, the kind with no line and no list. They are full of people out with coworkers, and coach points out you can find a stunning woman who got dragged to a dive bar by her friends.

Go midweek when you can. A woman out on a Wednesday chose to be out, the room is quieter, and you can actually talk. Save the selective lounges and rooftops for when you are comfortable. They are worth it in warm weather, when the open air keeps the music low.

My suggestions for meeting women through what you do are a yoga or pilates class, or a social dance class like salsa. Friends of friends are another source, and New York has a group for almost any interest you could name.

These routes are slow. You meet a handful of women, and you do not choose which ones. They do give you something in common from the first minute, and they keep your week full, which makes approaching easier too.

coach says New York is the best city he knows for online dating and recommends using the apps. He also calls them "a bonus round." They cost time, women often look different from their photos, and a lot of other men are on them putting in real effort. Use them for twenty minutes a day, not twenty hours a week.

• Two weekday lunches or evenings in a park or cafe, with a set number of approaches each time.
• One weeknight at ordinary bars, moving on if a place is empty.
• One weekend afternoon in a park, when the weather allows.
• One class or social activity, chosen because you would enjoy it anyway.
• A short daily app session, with a timer.

That week puts you in front of more women than most men in the city meet in a month.

Every method above depends on one thing: whether you walk over. Most men can name three good parks and still go home without saying a word to anyone. The city punishes that hesitation, because the woman you noticed is around the corner in ten seconds.

Cold Approach trains exactly that moment in its Bootcamp, which runs in person in Miami and New York only. In New York it is arranged with you after you book: Private runs one, two or three days with your coach alone, and Group, with no more than three students per coach, is available on request. Each training day is two four-hour blocks in the field, with daygame and night game mixed to suit you and live coaching on every approach. There is no skill floor, and approach anxiety is the specialty.