How to Unmatch or Block Someone on OkCupid

Open her page or your conversation with her, tap the three dots at the top, and choose block. OkCupid treats blocking and unmatching as the same feature, so there is no separate unmatch button to look for. Blocking removes the conversation from her Conversations page and makes your account look deleted to her. OkCupid does not otherwise tell her.

You can do it from two places.

1. From her page. Open it and tap the three dots at the top.
2. From your conversation. Open the chat with her and tap the three dots at the top.

Either way, choose block. That is the whole process.

Many apps give you two options: unmatch, which ends the connection quietly, and block, which is for someone you never want to hear from again. OkCupid does not split them. On OkCupid, unmatching someone and blocking her are the same action.

So do not waste time hunting for an unmatch option. If you want to end things with a match, block is the button, even if she did nothing wrong and you simply are not interested.

From her side, the conversation with you disappears from her Conversations page, and your account looks as if it has been deleted.

OkCupid does not send her a notice saying you blocked her. She is not told, beyond noticing that you seem to be gone. That makes blocking a clean way to end a match. There is no announcement and nothing for her to reply to.

Blocking is not only for someone who behaves badly. Use it whenever a match is taking up space and going nowhere.

• She is rude, pushy or makes you uncomfortable. Block her. You owe no explanation.
• You matched on a quick Like and lost interest once you read her page. a dating coach's attitude to low-interest matches is simple: unmatch them. It is not a big deal, and it keeps your list full of women you actually want to talk to.
• The conversation has been dead for weeks. If neither of you has written in a long time and you have no plans to, clearing it keeps your list honest.
• You have started seeing someone. Cleaning out old matches is a considerate thing to do once you are off the market.

If you think you might want to talk to her later, hold off. Once you block her, the conversation is gone from her side, and your account looks deleted to her.

Most of the time, just block. A match you have exchanged three messages with does not need a speech, and a polite goodbye can invite a back-and-forth you do not want.

The exception is a woman you have actually been on a date with. If you met her and decided it is not a fit, a short, kind message before you go is decent. Something like "I enjoyed meeting you, but I don't think we're a match. Good luck out there." Then block if you want the chat closed. Vanishing on someone you spent an evening with is poor form, even on an app.

The same button works on you. When a woman blocks you, your conversation with her disappears and her account looks deleted from your side.

The odd block is normal. Women clear out their matches for all sorts of reasons. But a dating coach makes a point that is worth taking seriously if it happens a lot. On any dating site, the app wants its users, and especially its most attractive women, to be happy. Suppose women keep complaining about you and unmatching you because your messages offend them. He believes the app notices, and starts showing you to fewer people.

His advice is not to be bland. Some edge and some teasing help you stand out. The line is offense: messages so crude or aggressive that women report you. Stay playful and just short of that line, and you get the benefit of being memorable without paying for it.

Think of blocking as housekeeping, not drama. A shorter list of matches means you notice when someone interesting writes, and you answer her quickly.

Keep the women you are glad to talk to. Clear out the ones you are not. Then put your effort into the conversations that are going somewhere, with short messages that move toward a drink and her number.

a dating coach's case for online dating is that it is extremely time efficient once it is set up. Matches come in while you are doing other things. That only works if your list stays manageable. A handful of live conversations you actually care about beat dozens you scroll past, and blocking the dead ones is how you keep it that way.