How to End a Conversation on Inner Circle

Slide the conversation to the right to reveal End Chat, or open it and use the three-dot menu. Either way, Inner Circle makes you select a reason. The other person is told you have decided to move on but not your exact reason, unless you choose Other and write a personal message. Ended conversations are permanently deleted and cannot be recovered, so be sure before you tap.

Both routes take a few seconds.

From your list of conversations, slide the one you want to close to the right. An End Chat option appears. If you are already inside the chat, tap the three dots and end it from that menu instead.

Whichever route you take, the app asks you for a reason before it lets the conversation go. You cannot skip that step, so it helps to know what each choice means for her before you get there.

The reason you pick stays private. She is told that you have decided to move on, and nothing about why.

The one exception is Other. If you choose it, you write a personal message, and that is what she reads. So the listed reasons are the clean, quiet exit. Other is for when you have something worth saying to her in your own words.

Most of the time, a listed reason is the kinder choice. She learns the chat is over without having to read an explanation she did not ask for.

Once you end a chat, Inner Circle deletes it for good. You cannot restore it later, and you cannot scroll back through it.

That has two practical consequences. If the two of you swapped numbers and moved to texting, nothing is lost, because the conversation that matters lives on your phone now. But if there is any chance you want to pick the chat back up next month, do not end it yet. Leave it where it is.

It also means you should never end a conversation angry. A reply that annoyed you at midnight often reads fine the next morning. Sleep on it, then decide.

A few situations call for it.

She has stopped replying. You sent one light follow-up with a real plan in it, and a week later there is still nothing. The chat is over whether or not you end it, so end it.

You met, and it was not a fit. Letting the conversation fade leaves her wondering. Ending it tells her plainly.

You have started seeing someone and want to give that a fair chance. Closing your other chats is the honest way to do it.

You need the room. Inner Circle only lets you keep a few active chats at a time, so a conversation going nowhere is taking up a place someone else could use.

a dating coach's warning about app conversations covers all of these. Most men chat aimlessly for days or weeks, never ask the woman out, and the conversation slowly dies. Ending a dead one is just admitting what already happened.

Do not end a chat because she took a day to answer. Plenty of women check the app once in the evening, and a slow reply is not a no.

Do not end it because you are nervous about asking her out, either. If the conversation has been warm, ask. The worst answer is no, and a clear no is still better than a chat that dies of silence.

Keep it to one or two sentences. Be kind, be brief, and do not explain what was wrong with her.

After a date that did not click: "Thanks for Thursday, I had a nice time. I did not feel the spark I was hoping for, and I would rather say so than go quiet. Good luck out there."

When you have met someone: "I have enjoyed talking to you. I have started seeing someone and want to give it a real shot. All the best."

Leave out anything that asks for a reply, argues a point, or tries to make her feel guilty. a dating coach's advice for walking away from an approach that is not going well holds here too. Leave in a friendly way, and the other person will almost always end it pleasantly as well. There is nothing to gain from a sour ending, and you may well cross paths again.