In the US, yes. Tinder has partnered with Noonlight, a safety service available only in the US on Android and iOS. Once it is connected you can share where, when and with whom your date is happening. You can also discreetly call for emergency help. In the Noonlight app you press and hold the button, then release it without entering your PIN, and local police are alerted to your location.
How to add Noonlight
You connect it from the conversation with the woman you are seeing. Tinder's steps are:
- On Tinder, open the chat with the person you are going to see in person.
- Tap the Noonlight logo, the blue circle icon at the bottom of the screen.
- Choose Add Noonlight. You will be sent to Noonlight.com.
- If you are new to Noonlight, sign up and create a short PIN. Noonlight only uses your details in an emergency.
Once it is set up, you can add a date to Noonlight's Timeline feature with the where, when and who of the plan.
How the button works
The button lives in the Noonlight app, not inside Tinder.
To call for help, open the Noonlight app, press and hold the button, then release it and do not enter your PIN. Local police are notified of your location and that there is an emergency. If it was a false alarm, or you are fine again, release the button and enter your PIN instead.
The design is deliberate. Holding a button is something you can do with your phone in your pocket or under the table, without anyone noticing, and letting go is the signal. Practise once at home so your hand knows the motion.
What Noonlight learns about your match
Tinder says the only data shared with Noonlight is data you choose to share. If you connect it and add a date entry through the Timeline feature, details such as the name and profile photo of the person you are seeing are sent to Noonlight. Tinder says that information is used only in an emergency, and with your permission.
So nothing about her leaves Tinder unless you add the date yourself. If you would rather not share her details, you can skip the Timeline entry and still have the button.
If you decide you do not want Noonlight connected at all, you can remove it. Open Tinder's settings, scroll down to Tinder Safety and tap Noonlight Safety Partner.
The badge she sees in your messages
Connecting Noonlight adds a badge to your chats, which tells the other person you are protected by Noonlight.
Think about what that says from her side. A man who shows he takes safety seriously is a man who is easier to say yes to. You do not need to mention it, explain it or make a speech about safety. The badge does the talking, and your conversation can stay about the drink on Thursday.
Why a man might want it
Most men file safety tools under things women use. a dating coach's view is more practical.
His advice for any online date is to meet in a nice, well-lit public place and make sure someone else knows where you are. He grants that these are mostly precautions women take, since they usually face more physical danger. He also says a man who values his own life should take a few precautions anyway.
He adds some habits that make an emergency button far less likely to be needed. Keep the first date somewhere convenient for you, ideally close to home, so you can leave easily if the evening turns strange. Do not invite a woman back to your place when you know nothing about her yet. And if you have any doubt about who she is, do a short phone or video call before you commit an evening.
Outside the US
Noonlight is only available in the US. If you live anywhere else, the same protection comes from habits rather than an app.
Pick a busy public place you know. Tell one reliable friend where you are going, with whom and roughly when you expect to be done, and message them when you leave. Tinder's Share My Date feature can send a friend a link with the place, the time and a photo of your match. Arrange your own way home rather than relying on her or on a stranger for a lift. And if something feels wrong, leave. You owe nobody a finished drink.
The short answer
Tinder's panic button is Noonlight, and it is US only. Connect it from the chat with the person you are seeing, create your PIN on Noonlight.com, and in an emergency hold the button in the Noonlight app and let go without entering your PIN. Local police will be sent your location. Everywhere else, a public place, a friend who knows your plans and an easy way home do the same job.
Written by Matthew Stevens, Co-Founder & Head Coach. More than half a decade coaching men across the US and worldwide.
Everything here comes out of real coaching work: the approaches, dates, texts and profiles we go through with the men we coach.