What Pictures Should You Use on Dating Apps?

Use a clear, well lit photo of your face first. Follow it with a full length photo of you, one of you doing something you actually do, and one with other people where she can tell which one is you. Four strong photos in that order beat a dozen you picked because you had them.

Her first look at you lasts a second or two. The picture on that look has one job, which is to show a real face.

Choose a recent photo taken in daylight, with you alone, your eyes on the camera, and a mood that looks like you rather than a held pose. No sunglasses, no hat pulled low, no mask around the chin, no filter.

a dating coach's advice on getting a good one is to stop settling for the first take. A man in one of his profile reviews had a well staged photo in front of a landmark, with a flattering layout, and the only weak spot was a stiff expression. My note was that he should have taken a hundred of that same shot and kept the best. Take far more than you think you need and let someone else pick.

She wants to know what you look like below the neck, and a plain full length photo answers it.

Stand up straight in normal clothes in a normal place, in decent light. A gym mirror selfie is the usual substitute, and it tends to answer a different question than the one she asked.

A shirtless shot deserves care. coach reviewed a client with a strong physique who was getting a decent number of matches but not the women he wanted, and one reason he gave was the shirtless photo. If the women you are after could pick a man with a better body, a photo that leads with yours can work against you. His suggestion was to test the page without it.

Watch the camera angle too. coach flagged a photo that made a perfectly normal man look about three feet tall. A shot from too far away or too low can do that, so check how tall you look before you keep it.

This is the picture that gives her something to ask about.

It should show an interest or a habit that is yours: riding a motorbike, cooking, a trip, a sport, a workshop. coach liked a photo of a well dressed man with a motorcycle because the contrast between polished and adventurous said something about him and fit his real life.

The test for this picture is whether she could start a question from it. A man standing in a plain room in a t-shirt gives her nothing. A man at the top of a hill with a dog gives her three things.

One photo with friends or family tells her you have a life outside the app.

The rule is that she must be able to tell which one is you at a glance. coach pointed to a striking group photo in a profile review and said he could not tell who the man was in it, which made the photo useless however good it looked. Put yourself near the middle and keep the group small.

Never use this one as the lead. Asking a stranger to hunt for you in a crowd is a request most people will not accept.

Cut anything that does not earn a place.

Cut the second photo from the same afternoon in the same shirt, because it counts as one picture using two slots. Cut anything dark, grainy, or taken from across a room. Cut anything with an ex, or half an ex, in it. Cut the shot where you are holding a fish or a drink and your face is hidden.

Cut the boring ones too. My most common complaint about profiles is not that men look bad but that they look like everyone else: standing in an ordinary room, in ordinary clothes, doing nothing. A woman who sees a hundred of those a day moves on without deciding anything.

Four to six pictures is enough for almost every man. The order is face, build, activity, people, and then your best extra if you have a good one.

Lead with the strongest face picture you have. Put the activity photo second or third, since it is the one most likely to hold her attention once she is looking. Finish with something that adds, not something that fills.

Photos and words are read together. If your pictures show a man who travels and goes out, and your written answers read like a man who stays home, the set feels borrowed. Pick pictures that tell the same story as everything else on the page.

Check your set the way a stranger would. Show it to someone who does not know you and ask what you do for work and what you do on weekends. If the guess is close, the pictures are doing their job. If it is far off, replace the ones that are lying.

Many men look at this list and realize they have no good pictures at all. That is common, and it is fixable in an afternoon with a friend, a phone and daylight outside. Take a lot of shots in a handful of places and different outfits, then choose.

Whichever route you take, aim for pictures that look like you on a good day, in the clothes you would actually turn up in.