A Flower puts you instantly on the other person's Likes You page, where people who send Flowers appear at the top. Anyone who sent a Flower is unblurred even for free users, so she can see exactly who you are and like you back for free. You can send Flowers in Suggested or Discover, they are bought with Beans, and Premium subscribers get some free Flowers every month.

Why being unblurred is the real value

Start with what an ordinary like does for a free user on the receiving end. The people who liked her are blurred, so she cannot see who they are.

A Flower is the exception. People who sent one are unblurred even for free users. That means she sees your face and can like you back without paying anything. For any woman who has not paid for the app, that is the difference between being a blur and being a person.

An ordinary like reaches her as an anonymous blur. A Flower turns it into a face, and into a decision she can make with one free like.

Add the placement at the top of her Likes You page and you get the two things a Flower actually buys: she sees you first, and she sees you clearly.

Flowers win attention, not matches

That is where the power of a Flower stops. It changes where you appear and whether she can see you. It does not change what she thinks of what she sees.

If your lead photo is a dark group shot and your answers are generic, a Flower puts that at the top of her page, unblurred, and she passes on it faster. If your photos are recent and clear and your answers say something real about you, the same Flower gets a strong first impression in front of her before anyone else's.

A Flower multiplies what you already have. Applied to a weak page, it multiplies nothing. So before you spend Beans on one, make sure your first photo shows your face in daylight and at least one of your answers gives her something to respond to.

Who deserves a Flower

The worst use of a Flower is the woman you find most attractive and have nothing to say to. The best use is the woman where you can name exactly why you liked her.

Maybe her answer about Sunday markets made you laugh. Maybe one of her photos is at a climbing gym you go to. If you can already picture your opening line, a Flower gets it in front of her. If you cannot think of anything specific, an ordinary like is the better choice, and it costs you nothing.

A Flower also says something about you. It tells her you chose her deliberately. That lands well when it is backed by a specific reason. It lands oddly when it is followed by "hey."

Suggested or Discover

You can send Flowers from either tab, and the choice changes what the Flower is doing for you.

In Suggested, both your preferences and hers were taken into account, so you are already a reasonable fit on paper. A Flower there mostly makes sure she sees you, first and clearly.

In Discover, her preferences are not considered. A Flower there is how you get in front of someone who might never have come across you otherwise. That can work, but it is the longer shot, so save those Flowers for women where your reason for liking her is especially strong.

Spend them like they are scarce

Flowers cost Beans, and Beans cost money unless you earn them. Premium subscribers get some free Flowers each month, but even then there are not many of them.

Treat a small number as a small number. One or two a week, sent only where you already know your first line, will do more than a burst sent across your whole batch. When a Flower goes to everyone, it stops meaning anything, to her and to you.

A simple way to ration them: as you go through your batch, keep a short mental list of the women you liked and could open well with. At the end, send a Flower to the one at the top of that list, not to all of them.

What to send once she likes you back

The Flower told her you are interested. Your first message has to match that energy with something specific.

Mention the thing that made you send it. "I had to send a Flower after your answer about the worst date spot in the city. What's the winner?" is easy to reply to and shows you actually read her page. A plain "hey" after a Flower makes the gap between your effort and your words obvious.

Then keep it short and friendly, and suggest a drink after a few good exchanges. The Flower got you seen. The conversation gets you the date.